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Swindle Slang

17 December, 2012 by Hew Leave a Comment

TEE SHOTS

taken from http://www.saturdayswindle.co.uk/golfslang.htm

A Sally Gunnell

Ugly but will run well (a poorly hit shot that goes along the ground for a good distance

A Paula Radcliffe

Not as ugly as a Sally Gunnell but will run for miles

A Condom

Safe but didn’t feel really good

A Glenn Miller

Kept low and didn’t make it over the water

A Yasser Arafat

Ugly and in the sand

A Gerry Adams

A Provisional (playing a second shot if you think your first is lost)

An O J Simpson

Got away with it

A Princess Grace

Should have taken a driver

A Michael Jackson

Gradually fading (going off line)

A Douglas Bader

Looked good in the air but didn’t have the legs

A Ken Livingstone

Way off left

A Jean-Marie Le Pen

Too far right

An Arsene Wenger

Everyone saw where it went but you

FAIRWAY SHOTS

A Kate Winslet

A little bit far (hitting too much of the ground) but otherwise perfect

A Kate Moss

A but thin (hitting too high on the ball)

A Michael Barrymore

A long iron

A Russell Grant

A fat iron

A Wilfred Bramwell

A thin iron

A Peter Mandelson

An unbelievable iron

An Arthur Scargill

A great strike but a poor result

A son-in-law

Not what you wanted but it’ll do

IN A HAZARD

An Eva Braun

Picked up in the bunker

A Saddam Hussain

Go from bunker to bunker

A Chuck Berry

(In the tees) no particular place to go

A Red October

Underwater and you won’t find it

PUTTING

A Cuban

Ball needed one more revolution

A Salman Rushdie

Putt that is impossible to read

A Rock Hudson

Thought it was straight but it wasn’t

A Dennis Wise

A nasty five footer

A Diego Maradona

A very nasty five footer

Filed Under: Humour

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